Lines in Relationships, lets Break em!

Dear Reader,

It is amazing to me, I met Misha when I was twenty or so. (that is a long time ago) Anyway, her group of friends were about five lesbians. In a month or so I realized that each of them had slept with another at one time or so in the past.

My mind spun. Really? Does that happen? Do people stay friends, support and help each other even after the dreaded break up?

I thought they were kidding, really. In my life experience up to that point I only knew how the other side lived, (heterosexuals). They did not, NOT, mingle with ex's or mistresses, or affairs. Actually most of that wasn't talked about except when angers flared.

To my surprise these women didn't do those lines, labels and such. They were real friends. Okay, maybe lesbians had something on this relationship gig that I hadn't known about. I hung out for a little longer in Lesbo land.

Shortly afterwards I found that all lesbians weren't reflected in my friend, Misha and her friends. They were the exception to the rule, for human relationships. Too bad, cause I kind of liked this idea.

Misha, my friend, was with Brandy. Actually Misha loved her, asked her to marry her, while Brandy was with Shannon. That caused some strife which died down in about 6 months. Shannon was now with Michelle, who was best friends with Jamie, Brandy's girlfriend. Misha was the friend with all of them. Through out the next two years, there were breakups and come together but the core always remained the same. I found out through talking with Misha it was because she relied on God.

okay, that was a little out there for me, God? He wasn't exactly on my list of people who liked lesbians. So time went on and I saw that she wasn't lying. It became part of my lessons in growing up in public. Women really could love each other and be friends without the anger, hatred, and fear of who is dating who.

How does that happen? Since then I have run into scores of women that have judgements, labels, and beliefs about the same-sex relationships. Misha and were together as a couple for a long time. Today I count her on my friends list. She has been invaluable to me, in my spiritual, emotional and mental growth. Along the way, it got hard, I fell in love with another woman and she had to watch from the sidelines as I went through the motions.

It's where I came up with the "cycle of unhealthy lesbian relationships" Misha and I agreed that no matter what we would find the road that led back to friendship. Sometimes that road takes a year but in the end if the willingness is there, two people can indeed find the grace to forgive.

There is the story about the kids in the sandbox. You ever hear of it? Two moms are sitting on a bench watching the kids play. Suddenly one of the kids begins to yell and scream. The other one stands and yells back and they storm out of the sandbox in two different directions. Five minutes later they are back in the sandbox playing.

The first mother says, "Did you see that? They were fighting only a moment ago and now they are playing as if nothing ever happened." she was in awe of this. The second mother replies, "Of course, they choose happiness over righteousness."

While I enjoy playing in the sandbox, from time to time I get angry and throw a tantrum. I would be lying if I said I was a saint. The woman I fell in love with I made the same committment too, that I would always find the road back to friendship. She has agreed to the same, from over ten years ago I learned that lesson. Today I practice it in all my affairs. Even in my affairs, lmao.

It boggles my mind to hear that not everyone else does this, I guess not everyone has heard about the sandbox. That's okay, love does not expect, it is patient. I may not understand another's reasoning for labels, lines and judgements but I can respect them.

Thank you, and come on!! The sandbox has room for another castle!

ever growing, Rochelle

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